As I look in the mirror, I’m taking stock. Head: My pink hair makes me smile. Belly: A part of me that I’ve waged war with for years. Legs: Amazing and strong. They can deadlift 375lbs. Chest: Deep breath. I am wearing a compression bra; I had a mastectomy 2 weeks ago.
This is my body.
The same body that I was angry at for years. I take a deep breath and apologize out loud: “I am sorry, for the years that I was mean to you, for the years I waged war against you.” And my body sighs relief. Finally.
Here’s the deal: Our bodies, no matter how they look, are ours. We only get one, so why wage war against it? Our bodies allow us to live. No matter how big, small, fat, thin, hairy, bald, freckly, chubby, thick-ankled, etc. they are, our bodies are vessels that allow us to breathe, walk, love, laugh, and carry out our journeys. They are vehicles for life, and they do not define us.
Letting my breast go made me realize that I am not my breast. Who I am is not held in that part of my body. Who I am is not defined by boobs, butt, belly, anything…unless I allow it to be that way. For far too many years, I did allow it. Today, I do not.
This doesn’t mean that I don’t have days of self-loathing. I do. However, now I actually apologize to my body out loud. It does not deserve hate. I will celebrate it everyday. I will treat it with respect. I will love it. It is me.
By Gina Best