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Does your inner critic rule your life? by Victoria Welsby, Founder of BAM POW LIFE
We all have a pesky inner critic telling us that we don’t measure up, aren’t good enough, not worthy of the love we have in our lives, not beautiful enough… and so on.
How the heck do we deal with this seemingly ever-present, fault-finding, nit-picking detractor?
Thing is, our inner critic is often doing us a favor. We may not realize it, but our inner critic can help to keep us safe. Our inner critic can make us cautious and stop us from taking life-threatening chances.
You may notice that when you’re in a period of growth in your life, your inner critic is loud and proud, whispering sweet nasties in your ear. That’s because with growth comes risk.
What our inner critic doesn’t know is that fancy party you want to go to or that speech you want to make at work isn’t going to be potentially life threatening (although it may feel like it sometimes!). So, we need to take charge and tell our inner critic some home truths.
When your inner critic is saying, “Girl, you’re ugly! Better not show that sad face and those pathetic clothes at that dinner party! People are going to be laughing at you behind your back!”; you simply respond with, “Thank you so much for your concern. I know social rejection can be scary, but I got this. I may be nervous, but I can do it… and those who judge me for my appearance are not people I want in my life anyway!”
You should be firm, but empathetic with your inner critic. After all, your inner critic is scared. You’re going to reassure it that you’re in charge and can handle your own business.
Once you make a practice of standing up to your inner critic, it’ll get easier. The verbal attacks will get less frequent, less vicious, and when they do come up (because they always will), you’ll be in a place where you can handle it like the badass boss that I know you are!