We have all had moments in our lives when we felt out of control. Perhaps you were overwhelmed by responsibilities, had your world rocked by a personal loss, or were eaten away by an unhealthy habit.

Feeling out of control can make us feel powerless, small, and anxious. It can also make you believe things will never get better, and you have no agency. Here’s the good news: that isn’t true. That’s why we’re sharing our tips for feeling more in control of your life to help you start taking steps toward a better headspace.

Identify What Is and Isn’t in Your Control

Nothing makes us feel more out of control than when our efforts to create order don’t work. But sometimes, things that seem like we can change them were never meant to be changed in the first place. At least not by us. In those cases, trying to take control can leave you feeling powerless.

A few things that you shouldn’t waste energy trying to change include:

  • Other people’s attitudes or lifestyles
  • Other people’s opinion of you
  • Your age
  • World events
  • Large, unavoidable life events, like death or sickness
  • Life changes
  • The passage of time

Once you understand what you can’t control, it’s easier to identify what you can. For example, you can’t control a loved one getting sick, but you can bring them healthy food and tell them you love them. You can’t change what someone thinks of you, but you can change how you think of yourself.

Take Care of Your Body

You can often feel abandoned and unimportant when you feel out of control. A gentle way to remind yourself of your value is to take care of your body.

This doesn’t have to mean getting a spa treatment. It can be simple things, like:

  • Going outside
  • Washing your hair with shampoo
  • Prioritizing skin care
  • Exercising
  • Eating some nourishing food

Don’t forget that taking care of yourself also includes taking a break to do things you enjoy and getting the rest you need.

Organize in Pieces

Being surrounded by a mountain of responsibilities can be overwhelming. Trying to organize said responsibilities can feel like you’re drowning. Instead of trying to “get your life together,” focus on a single task. For example, maybe the thought of cleaning your whole house sounds horrible. But throwing away old papers in one drawer may be more manageable.

Make a Small Change

Nothing makes us feel more out of control than change. But change can also be a powerful tool to make you feel like you have more control over your life, specifically when you are in charge of the change.

For example, if you move to a new place, pick a new interior design theme for your room. Or you can do the old reliable and dye your hair after a breakup. Doing this will remind you that you have the power to change the world around you. And that power will remind you that you aren’t so out of control after all.

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