Melodie Gonzalez
Living with a chronic illness has changed my life in an indescribable way. I went from running marathons, doing yoga everyday and finally being healthy to someone that I don’t even recognize anymore. I am happily married and have 3 young boys and live with the guilt that I have let them down! I’ve lost my confident self, the medical assistant that took care of the sick and the full time working mom who could juggle it all, to a person that needs a nap after a shower. I was at my lowest this past month emotionally because a doctor that I was seeing suggested that I starve myself in order to lose weight.
I sat and listened to her fat and body shame me because I was heavier than I was at my last visit. I kept trying to tell her that this illness started when I was 90 pounds lighter but she wouldn’t listen. I felt really depressed for a couple of weeks until I started to realize that this physician or my chronic pain doesn’t have to completely change who I am. I started practicing self love and using my voice to advocate for my health care.
I started following plus size bloggers and make up tutorials to build up my own self-confidence so that I could stop being my worst enemy. I wanted to share my journey as a fibromyalgia warrior mom, because I know that I’m not alone even though at times it feels that way. My goal is to start running again, lose the 90 pounds of weight that all of these steroids and pain killers have added on to my body. I am on a journey of self discovery and at 38 years old I am finally finding out who I am.
